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Getting Chummy With Uncertainty

I know that 2016 has finally settled into the cells of my body. I’m no longer scratching out 2015 at the top of my journal entries as I remind myself that it’s a year later. The holidays have passed – clearly evident in the lack of colourful lights and Christmas decor (which I grew quite fond of actually). And I’m now revelling in the fact that it’s still light outside until about 6pm. (The. Best. Feeling.)

And along with my realization that it’s indeed 2016, I find myself reflecting with friends at how unsettling and tumultuous last year was. The year ended with everything I’d built in my professional life kinda just floating in the air. I had a clear idea of how I wanted to build my business and let’s just say that the universe had other plans. While I often refer to it all as unreal, I now understand that it served as more of a reality check. It forced me to take a hard look at how, and if, I’m walking my talk.

After all, it’s easy to be chill, mindful, present, grounded and aware when things are going well.

When life is all unicorns, ponies and rainbows, there’s no problem with chiseling out ‘me time’ in the day, getting quiet and sitting with nothing but my own thoughts. But when the proverbial shit hits the fan, that’s when I can see whether or not I’m applying all that practice of being with (and not reacting to) the drama. Uncertainty has a clever way of testing us – to see if we know how to just be.

‘Cuz that’s what all this meditation and mindfulness stuff is all about. It’s about sitting with your thoughts – the good, the bad and the ugly – without getting attached. It’s about letting those drifting thoughts, which are as inevitable as the rising and setting sun, to simply drift in and out. Rather than hanging onto any thought – feeding, growing and making it into something entirely different – we have the clear choice to let go of anything that comes into our mind. And then it’s about applying those same ideas to life. What we learn about sitting with ourselves during meditation, we apply to our day-to-day.

“No problem!” I thought when things got knocked off kilter, kicked out of balance and didn’t live up to my expectations. “I know how to rock this. Just keep moving. You got this!” I repeated to myself. (Embarrassingly so when I was busted by the bf talking to myself in the bathroom, reminiscent of the old SNL skits of Stuart Smalley but whatevs.)

That’s when the second part of the lesson came in. I kept moving, reaching out, making connections, planting seeds and following up on opportunities. And y’know what followed?

A chorus of crickets.

“Ah. Right.” I reminded myself, “Things won’t always happen on my time.” Because – let’s be honest – things won’t always fall into our laps, and not for a lack of trying! We can work hard, hustle and put it out there but sometimes, things take longer than we’d hope. And other times, they’re simply not meant to be.

Getting chummy with uncertainty is knowing that we’ve done our best and trusting that our best is enough. {Tweet that.}

It’s about knowing that sometimes the things we think we really, really, really need the most in our lives, truly aren’t meant to be and aren’t always in our best interest. It’s about rolling with the punches and choosing not to close. It’s about being aware of other possibilities and walking through the doors that quietly swing open as a result of our actions but not necessarily of our accord. And it’s about letting those doubts creep in, sitting with them, smiling  at them and letting them go.

xo

2 Comments

  • Corinne K.
    February 25, 2016 at 5:36 pm

    Hi Mary Claire! I totally agree – you never know how things will work out until you just try. It’s not always easy, takes some mastering and we can often slip up but that’s all part of the beauty. Thanks for sharing! <3

  • Mary Claire
    February 25, 2016 at 2:29 am

    Yes to all of this. So, so good. Shit hit the fan for me at the end of 2015 and it was the biggest challenge ever to “walk the walk!” Mindfulness, trust, and curiosity helps me navigate it all. Be curious- like a cat- to see how the chips will fall… Or stack up. Uncertainty, not knowing the ending- it’s just how it is, so you’re right. Cozy up with it and smile. ?

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